Breathing In The Sun

breathing in the sun


Early morning at the bus stop,
eyes closed,
light still bleeds through,
filling my head with that yellowy red,
my breath slides in and out of my lungs almost effortlessly,
I feel the sun breaking up the chill bite of the morning,
the soothing sounds of chillstep flow from my headphones,
breathing slows as the music swells,
and the cars slow,
the sun on my skin is warm now,
a golden glow,
transporting me,
sends me sliding back through my memories,
I’m resting in the sunlight with a cat tucked behind the curtain,
eyes closed,
sounds of video games emanates above me,
my rashy face itches,
another glide,
I’m sitting in the car with my ex,
catnapping in the oppressive summer heat,
every so often I wake to her wiping the sweat from my brow with a napkin,
I sleepily beam at her,
then I’m gliding further,
I’m sitting on the porch of my mother’s friend,
furiously rubbing life and warmth into my hands,
my limbs,
tucking my overloaded backpack behind my legs,
and then sitting in that chair facing the sunrise,
coated in the purest golden yellow,
glorious warm that soaks into my frigid limbs,
just as I feel it,
I’m gliding again,
far back,
the rushing of cars fading into softly crashing waves,
the crisp smell of seawater fills my nostrils,
as the seagulls circle and call overhead,
I dig my toes into the warm damp sand,
peanut-butter brown
melanin skin drinking the sunlight in,
tongue heavy with the taste of homemade sweet tea,
I take a deep breath,
before the sand shifts under my feet,
the furthest I’ve been,
I sit in the stuffy car seat,
with the afternoon sun on my golden skin,
greedily clutching the sticky space jam toy I’ve been given,
my mother is the passenger side,
but it seems so far away,
she reaches one of her milk-chocolate arms back,
they’re so long,
and uses a wet wipe to clean my face and hands,
I can’t see too much,
because everything is golden,
the sun has become rainbows in my eyelashes,
it’s warm,
a little too hot,
I nod off,
and open my eyes,
the colors in the world look off behind my shades,
a bit too dull,
a bit too gray,
but that’s okay,
the bus is here,
and I am clean,
I stand tall on strong legs
as I go to pay.